Movie Review: Dark Ride

I’ve been waiting a long time for this, this film Dark Ride, and a few others from the 8 films to die for collection. The Blockbuster by me thinks it’s okay to carry just one copy of their films, and Dark ride teased me for nearly a month, as I checked in and waited patiently for a copy of my own.

WHAT’S IT ABOUT?

Well, the beginning takes off in complete horror. 2 twin girls decide to go on a ride at a local amusement park. Dark Ride. They ride on a roller cart through a horror house.
As a viewer the tension is not high, and I was not surprised when they are murdered. It’s sort of expected.

The murderer is thrown into a mental facility, and Dark Ride is closed down.

20 years later you are introduced to group of college students planning a trip up to New Orleans, and get sidetracked as they make different plans to go spend the night in Dark Ride to save some money on hotel fees. On the way they pick up a trash bag female hitchhiker letting off the whole ‘I’ve got STD’S’ vibe.

They smoke some dope, and end up at Dark Ride. They make there way in and settle down for the night.

But Oh No! Jonah has escaped the mental facility and found his way back home to Dark Ride. He seems to have the inhuman powerful strength, and it reminded me of the same might and power that came from the character ‘The Jackal’ in Thirteen Ghosts.

Anyhow, it’s pretty obvious what is going to happen next, and what else is obvious at this point is who will live, and who will die.

Jonah picks them off one by one, in gruesome of ways. The killings are disgusting, but nothing I have not seen before in other horror movies.

The ending has a twist that me and my boyfriend guessed the moment the college kids plopped down and began discussing the history behind Dark Ride.

WHAT I LIKED ABOUT THE MOVIE:

Jonah was downright creepy. The killer who looked as if he was 7 feet tall also sported the most intimidating dirty porcelain doll like mask, which covered his deformed face. Honestly this was the best ‘scary bad guy’ I have seen since Freddy Krueger, Jason and Michael.
However the creepiness of it all sort of reminded me of the Texas Chainsaw’s character more than anything. Regardless Jonah was still just as intimidating, if not more.

I also enjoyed the acting; this was one of the first 8 films to die for flicks that I had seen with decent acting.

WHAT BOTHERED ME ABOUT THE FLICK:

First and foremost the main issue I had with this flick was the fact that Jonah escaped from the facility, in obvious ways. Yet no one was looking for him. I mean come on!
The mental guys (in movies anyway) usually go home when they escape the loony house, why would no one look in Dark Ride immediately after his escape?

I guess there wouldn’t be a film if that were the case, but it should have at least been an addressed issue, at least I think it should have been.

Secondly, there were a few disturbing scenes that could have been left out, and the nasty sex and booby shots were just unnecessary to add into the film. For a moment during the dirty scene I began to feel like the cameraman was getting all hot, and forgot to move the camera, seeing how for almost 30 seconds the camera was focused on boobs. It actually got annoying.

Picking up the hiker in the first place was also not needed… but I guess the more people present in the horror the more people for the killer to kill uniquely.

The third and last annoying thing in Dark Ride was how obvious things were. You knew who would die before they did. You knew who would live, and you knew the ending before it happened.

OVERALL:

Dark Ride had a great killer, some great actors, but this story was just too obvious for there to be any jumps and scares. Now if they’d take Jonah and market him into something bigger and better it would make for an excellent horror character.

1 star for the acting
1 more star for Jonah’s creepy character
1 star for the well-decorated set

-1 for having added un-needed scenes
-1 for being too obvious

RECOMMENDATION:

It’s not horrible, nor is it excellent. I’d recommend it for a rent, not a purchase. It makes for a good late night movie when nothing else is on TV.

It is not recommended for younger viewing audiences, sex, drugs, and blood are all present. 18+

94 Min.